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Last week we talked a little bit about marriage, monasticism, and what salvation is actually about. But, if we are to hear and respond to God calling us, we have to recognize the particular struggles and blessings of being single. Both married people and monastics have a particular calling to reflect the breaking through of the Kingdom of God in this world: the married through their ascetic reunification of male and female in love as a of the reunification of all things in Christ and the monastic through their ascetic dedication to purity and the angelic life as a of the life in the Kingdom to come.
I think single people have a particular calling to reflect the Kingdom through an ascetic commitment to the present moment, reflecting that heaven and earth meet only in the present moment. Of course, we all are called to love, purity, and meeting God in the now, but I think those who are single have a special opportunity to be an icon of the present to those around them because it is so tempting to sometimes treat being single and on your own like being in the waiting room for life to begin.
If we give in to this temptation we can become anxious and worried on the one hand or so carefree on the other that either way, we become Free orthodox christian dating blind to the opportunities to meet God here and now. Image from Pixabay. An amazing way to take advantage of the present moment as a single person is to dedicate yourself to prayer and Free orthodox christian dating. Set aside time to pray, to read Scripture, to read a spiritual book.
Make it to weekday services as often as you can. Whether marriage or monasticism lies ahead for you or not, using your time right now to encounter Jesus will not only prepare you for the future, but more importantly, will make sense of the now and bring peace to your everyday.
Start seeing the control you have over your life as a single person as a blessing and an opportunity to form your life around what really matters. Which le to my next thought. In addition to prayer and study, make an effort to find Free orthodox christian dating to serve the Church and your community. Call your priest and ask. By getting involved not only will you avoid the demonic temptation of single life that Free orthodox christian dating life is all about me, but you will begin to form a habit of centering your life around the life of the Church.
Then, no matter what job opportunities or potential relationships come along, you will have the right foundation for your life. It can be pretty easy as a single person to get used to a way of living that only takes into your own needs and desires. Thanks be to God, it is in struggle that we see who we really are and how God is calling us to grow. Free orthodox christian dating I insisting on my own way in all things or avoiding situations in which I might be asked to compromise and sacrifice?
Does all of money go towards making my life comfortable and easy? Everybody needs ability and support in their life. If you want to do well in class, you go to the professor or to a tutor for help and you study with your peers. If you want to do well in a new job, you rely on your boss and your coworkers to help you get acquainted with the culture and expectations of the workplace. Well, unsurprisingly, the same is true in the spiritual life.
You need mentors to guide you and set an example and peers to keep you on track. Obviously, your local OCF chapter and your parish are the places to start. Find a spiritual father and other mentors to whom you can go for advice and guidance. Make friends with people you respect and trust with whom you can be honest about yourself. Building an Orthodox community as a single person will help you in all other aspects of single life: you can support one another in prayer and study, you can serve the Church together, and you can learn to love one another with self-sacrificial love.
Today we present the third and last of three installments by Dr. Christ is everything. The Cross is a difficult privilege. I will also begin by asking you to listen to my wife singing a haunting song, Todaythat is about human lovers and that we can hear as the relationship between Christ and ourselves. He is our most intimate relationship. Perhaps it is not a matter of good or bad. Perhaps it is a matter of smart or not-so-smart.
Dating is a process of finding a mate to marry. Well, marriage has many beautiful intersections, negotiations, and complications. For example, in-laws and finances and where we will live and sexual activity and social life, etc. The real issue is children and how they will be raised. As you can infer, I strongly suggest that you do your very best to limit your dating to Orthodox partners, in OCF or your home parish or someone you may meet on Real Break or wherever. When a couple gets serious, there is a natural tendency to project into the future about how the mate will be.
When a couple is serious or engaged, they are rather delusional about the other.
But, the tendency is to expect the good qualities in the partner to become better and the bad qualities to become less. Such is not the case. The good qualities in a serious relationship do enlarge as time goes on. But, so do the bad qualities. The bad qualities enlarge just as the good qualities do.
Beyond dating, we all have many different kinds of adult relationships: parents, roommate, acquaintances, classmates, adult relatives, etc. Is there any kind of guideline for this kaleidoscope of life? Pellikka taken from WikiMedia Commons. To the extent that we can, we need to seek out relationships that give us strength and hope. We need to take initiatives to try to cultivate relationships that are a healing presence for us, and for whom we are a healing presence.
As guidelines, we need to be as authentic and as honest as we possibly Free orthodox christian dating with all our relationships. The mask we wear, the persona, can block meaningful exchange of energy between others and us. We gain vitality from meaningful relationships. Yes, we are sinners but we are much more than that.
We are His Beloved. He loves us as His children. Perfectionism in relationships can tarnish the quality of the relationship. Sometimes it helps to talk about our tendency towards perfectionism. Not all who read this blog have perfectionist tendencies, but I venture to say that most, most of you do. It goes with the territory of being human. You can access that podcast by clicking here. And, yes, Free orthodox christian dating Cross is a difficult privilege. You heard my wife sing Today. We navigate all our relationships as best we can by staying in the Present Moment, by centering ourselves in stillness.
He has written numerous articles on psychology and religion and published a book through Ancient Faith Publications entitled, Becoming a Healing Presence. He is a d clinical psychologist in the state of New York. Today we present the second of three installments by Dr. Why should I? To begin Free orthodox christian dating the beginning, God invented sex for His good reasons. So sex is sacred, good.
God knows what He is doing. He made human beings as male and female with a gravitational sexual desire for each other. But it is also true that sex only fits into human life within the context of real human life. Sex includes warmth, respect and mutual satisfaction. Basically, sex only fits into a context of commitment. My wife and I, married for 19 years with two children, did what married people do. We made love, that is, we had sex. I made the tea. The overhead Tiffany lamp, which I had made, was dimmed low. The time was PM, the outside street was quiet and the two children upstairs were asleep.
Those 15 minutes of tea-drinking were among the most precious times in my marriage. Image from Wikimedia. I knew two things for certain. I knew, existentially, that I was loved. How did I know? I knew because of what that woman did upstairs with me. She gave herself totally to me.
I also knew that I could love. All I had to do was look at her face. She was a happy camper. She would have done the same for me. Sexual activity needs a context, the context of a committed Christian marriage, an eternal agreement that I will be with you forever. Then, sexual activity has purpose and meaning. Expectations are dashed. Why do we abstain? The strongest answer is the truth expressed in music. I ask you to relax and listen to my wife singing The First Time.
The first time is the reason we abstain. We abstain so that the first time is with our lifetime partner, someone we can deeply cherish and who deeply cherishes us. But, the repentance path is much more difficult. The pure in heart can see God in the mirror because they know they are doing they are Free orthodox christian dating their best to preserve their inner fragrance, their inner innocence, their inner sweetness, for Christ and for the life He wants us to have, and for the life of the future children may have.
Today we present the first of three installments by Dr. I need to start where I always start, by saying the fundamental Orthodox truth, Christ is everything. We put everything in the context of Christ. One time a married woman said that, when she was dating, she was looking for someone who loved Christ more than her. She said she found someone and now is very happily married.
I would submit her approach to dating as an approach that works. I would also say that your job is to become a person whom someone else can find, someone who loves Christ more than the potential mate. So, why do we date?
We date because Christ made us that way, to grow-up into Him, to have the peace and the joy and the happiness that we all want.Free orthodox christian dating
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