Added: Kindall Olivar - Date: 15.02.2022 17:48 - Views: 13759 - Clicks: 5383
I am in route, driving across the country to Arizona. Then on to Texas, New Mexico and finally Arizona. We hope to arrive today just in time to celebrate Thanksgiving with our family. Moving gives you a reason to throw out a whole lot of unnecessary stuff, but I suspect that we will discover a lot more stuff that still needs to be tossed, gifted, or sold once we try to get settled in our new home. Purging is good.
But it takes focused attention and tons of time. The same can be said of things in our inner life. In the next few months, I will have more to say on sifting and sorting and letting go. Moving has been a metaphor for me to travel a little lighter, both in my outer life and in my inner life. Question: My husband and I have a 30 year old, good marriage in most aspects. But one area has needled me from the first days of our marriage. My husband enjoys looking at attractive women. I have expressed my hurt about this but he says he doesn't do it and I am crazy. I no longer say anything but it still cuts my heart.
I ask myself if I'm the crazy one. Do all men do this? From what I can observe, not many of the single or married man friends in our circles do this. I don't even want to go socially go out with my husband anymore because it hurts too much. I don't communicate it to him because he thinks I have a serious mental problem.
My husband is attractive and women have always been drawn to him and his personality. I haven't shared this with anyone because I am embarrassed about my insecurity. Answer: First, let me answer your questions. You are not crazy and you are not Husband looks at younger women insecure. All women find it uncomfortable and disrespectful to see their husband admiring or staring at a beautiful woman, especially after she has told him that it bothers her when he does it. And yes, most men do notice beautiful women. Probably most women notice beautiful women and men also.
Husband looks at younger women human eye admires beauty. However, men who respect and value their relationship with their wives, do not keep looking, they purposefully turn away, even if they do notice. You said that you and your spouse share a mostly good, 30 year marriage. I would think that a good marriage would reflect the opposite.
When a woman feels loved and cherished by her man, she feels more secure, not more insecure. Click to tweet. Also, in a good relationship when you repeatedly see your spouse doing something hurtful or offensive to you, and tell him, he listens and reflects on his own behaviors. If you choose option 1, whatever has been amicable in your marriage will get worse. If you choose option 2, you may find yourself actually Husband looks at younger women you are going crazy as you continue to pretend things are better than they are.
What would that look like? It might be that you speak up firmly when you observe him checking out other women. If he refuses to stop, you might choose to leave the social event, even if you have to call UBER to get home. Second, if he chooses not to change his behaviors, you can set a boundary. Until you are willing to see what you are doing and stop, I choose not to go out with you socially anymore. I know that will put a real crimp on your marriage the way it is and that is a huge risk.
There is no perfect path forward or sure-fire sentence that you can say that will wake him up to his behavior, but I would ask you to think about what glorifies God more?
Is it to just smile silently at his side while he disrespects you and other women? Or is it speak up, set boundaries and hope that through those actions and consequences, your husband may come to respect and value you as the helpmate God gave him? Friend, when your husband repeatedly looked at pretty women, what did you do? This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Which I promptly ripped up and threw at him. If he wants something else he can go find it. If we love our husbands, this is something that must be addressed with them. Alright, maybe not with a club, but with a broken spirit, and a wounded heart.
We need to share the truth of this particular sin with them, through our devotion and love. As wives, Proverbsis only one of several, words of wisdom on how to handle this approach, and it ensures healing. Scripture may not explain how often this step may take, but it does tell Husband looks at younger women how often we are to forgive.
Jesus uses a hyperbole to tell us how often to forgive others in Matthew Think of exactly what it is that is on your heart and how your husband can help bring closure to this problem. Most importantly, be consistent in prayer and seeking the Lord! When your husband is unable to communicate…. He cannot express…neither he understands what I say. This is a difficult personality. How do I deal with this. First Corinthians 13 tells us what love is. When a wife tells her husband that it hurts her when he repeatedly gawks, looks at, ogles another woman, and he refuses to stop doing it, it is apparent that the husband does not love his wife because love does not act this way.
Love protects. Love does not destroy and purposefully inflict undo pain. When a husband refuses to quit ogling other women, he sends a clear message that his heart is not right with God Husband looks at younger women he is choosing not to love his wife or obey God. Although lust is a sin and needs to be addressed in and of itself, common sense tells us that blatantly inflicting pain on another is not love and is sinful. This sin also needs to be addressed.
Matthew ,32; 1 Corinthians 5; Matthew are some scriptures that give instruction on how to respond to a husband who refuses to repent from a sinful lifestyle of blatantly inflicting undo pain on another as well as lusting. We talk to our spouse about their sin of lusting after other women.
Also, some churches do not follow scripture. Jesus speaks clearly about these issues in Matthew 5. In verse 28, Jesus says that the man who looks lustfully at a woman has committed adultery, and Jesus, in verse 32 says that one can divorce for sexual immorality. Jesus loves us and understands the hurt involved in lust and adultery so he gives us this Godly way of responding to it. Although we can not know for sure what a husband is thinking when he repeatedly looks at other women, we can read these verses to him and tell him we discern that he is lusting and needs to Husband looks at younger women.
And we can follow scripture as stated above. It is clear throughout the Bible that God despises the wickedness of sexual immorality and commands that we not commit adultery. It seems that the men who lust after other women really are in the marriage for the perks they can get out of it and will take or leave the marriage because of their lack of commitment to God and their wife. A boundary a wife would have is for the husband to quit repeatedly looking at other women.
It would be hard for a man to lust after a woman he is not looking at, but easier for him to lust if he repeatedly looks back at her. We can only do our part, as the Bible says, and pray that the man struggling with the sin of lust will repent and choose to love God and love his wife as God commands. Ugh I feel like no matter what we do, what we look like, men will always look at other women. I felt so worthless. I thought I looked hot until I saw her and my husbands reaction to her.
Your husband was disrespectful to you. Yes we are all attracted to beauty. God has wired us to enjoy looking at beautiful things. To see your beauty inside and out but he was busy gawking at something because his heart was disrespectful of you, of her and of his own self as a good man and husband. I brought it up to him before, and his response is one that would be detrimental.
So, what now? Its so weird you say that because mine does the same. Im not sure if its because we have had differences in the past or if its me because after having my kids I feel unattractive. I was attending a church for a few years.
Now my daughter refuses to attend church and will never go back to church with him. Mind you we argued about this for 3 years every Sunday. I lost my mom recently and I now want a divorce. Non of family has my back on it. Not sure what to do? I am a crushed woman Husband looks at younger women now. I was still grieving his loss from last June from cancer and right before Thanksgiving I discovered a picture of another woman. It has brought back memories of finding another picture years ago and also seeing one up on the wall of his office during an unannounced visit.
There were many many nights when he came home very late and always had an excuse. For a few years before his surgery for prostate cancer he refused a physical relationship with me saying that Husband looks at younger women told him he was hurting me physically during sex. I tried to explain what I thought he could do to help but we just talked in circles. We were married over 50 years. I know that I have to go on and heel but it seems impossible. There were alot of great things about him and everyone liked him.
We had some good times.
Took some nice little trips on occasion but I felt more like a friend or roommate than a wife. Hi I was gonna share with my husband that I seen him looking at couple of girls tonight at the gym. My boyfriend of 4 years have a good relationship.
I will admit I have always had some sort of trust issues due to my past but we worked through themmy issue is that we have gotten into plenty of arguments since we have been together about him making small conversations with people online, liking girls pictures, pretty much everything that has to Husband looks at younger women with other females. I told him over and over again I know you check out other women, all men do, but right in front of me is disrespectful. Move on and find a more respectful man.
Thank you for your article. I recently got married, and have already been grappling with this issue. My husband knows he is good-looking, and will make comments to me about all of the women that check him out.Husband looks at younger women
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Why are older men looking at women half their age?