My perfect boyfriend list

Added: Jackalyn Gall - Date: 05.07.2021 23:08 - Views: 28878 - Clicks: 3538

There are so many things we think matter. There are so many My perfect boyfriend list we all have on our perfect boyfriend list. Typically, they include words like tall, or well-built, or funny, or ambitious, or fun, or confident, or dark haired, or light haired, or stylish, or wealthy, or, well, you get the picture. We all have our lists, and they're all different, but they're also all very similar. They all have words that describe the ideal traits that we think we want in a partner.

But the reality is, none of these matter as much as one single word that conveys so much about what really matters, but is so often left off of our lists. Read through those words again.

My perfect boyfriend list

You see, my perfect boyfriend list used to look a lot like yours. I had everything on there that I thought were must-haves for anyone that I could possibly be attracted to, let alone spend the rest of my life with. And while I slowly figured out through lots of trial and error exactly what I did and didn't want, and what the deal breakers were and which qualities really mattered and which ones I could be much more flexible about, nothing compares to what I've learned since then.

That's when you learn what really matters. Back when I was datingbefore I had a clue just how important these qualities My perfect boyfriend list become, I had so many other concerns about what mattered.

My perfect boyfriend list

It mattered so much to me back then, My perfect boyfriend list can only imagine how many potential men I passed over simply because I never knew just how important this single quality really was. So take that list of yours, that long one that you keep updating but leaving the same things at the top that aren't getting you anywhere closer to the real kind of love you deserve, and put this at the top. You just think they do. Because how he treats you - how he is with you - says volumes about the type of person he is.

Yes, you need to be attracted to him. Yes, you want to share common interests and beliefs and philosophies. But at the end of the day, what really matters is about something far deeper than anything skin deep. Great to reconnect with our awesome Jane and amazing girls who expect the best in their love life Like Angel, I wholeheartedly agree! Finally, KIND is at the very top of my list!

And that we attract who My perfect boyfriend list are The question I have is how sometimes the super kind and sweet guy can lose his temper and be the opposite? So glad this resonated with you, Monica. It's because he's human, too. He has his own issues, his own triggers, his own struggles that have everything to him and nothing to do with you.

Your role here is only to decide what you can live with and what you can't. You can tell him how his temper affects you and what you need to see from him if he wants to continue to have you in his life. You can let him know you're not ok with this and recommend he get help for himself if it's that serious.

But ultimately, he has to want to do something about this himself. He has to be open to see it, to recognize his own triggers and be willing to change this. So many men were never allowed to expressed their emotions- yes, they do have them! As men, unless they have learned how to undo this, how to be an emotional human being and not just a programmed "macho" man, they will suffer still in their own ways and it may come out like this.

But this is his journey, not yours. Yours is only to be true to yourself about where your own boundaries lie. Evrything ielse comes next without any doubt Jane, i totally agree on that. He sometimes did "tried" to be kind to me but most of the time, he thinks of himself more than me or other people.

And i think it's true that we all consider better looking and search for Mr. But after this whole thing happened, i learned a lot from him and the past and i do realized that Mr. Right doesn't has to be a Calvin Klein model. Exactly, Nichole. When you My perfect boyfriend list clear on what matters most to you, you see all these qualities for what they are - and aren't. And you realize what matters most.

My perfect boyfriend list

Yes Jane, I agree that visual attraction My perfect boyfriend list all that we should consider then looking for Mr. I have been on so many "first dates" because once we started talking and discovered what "his" values and beliefs were I realized that he wasn't for me. It's very difficult to find a man with the same values and beliefs that you have, but I'm not willing to settle or less. I do believe that a woman can fall in love with who the man is even if he isn't Mr. Hi Jane, Thank you for reminding me that I need kindness also.

I deserve to be treated with loving respect. I am so kind to others and have had my ex take advantage of my kindness, he knows how to use it to his advantage. I also feel that honesty and communication are at the top of my list. I hate liars, how can you trust someone who denies something you know is true?

How can you ever trust them again? What else have they lied about? Jane, Thank you for helping to open my eyes. I still have so much healing and rediscovering of myself to do, it wont be easy but its better than taking his abuse and never knowing hour to hour how I am going to be treated by him. Lots of love and respect. I have a stressful life of low income and 3 daughters, my boyfriend helps a little, but keeps his distance for the most part. After 3 years, I still feel alone, and honestly don't think I want to deal with the complications of a man in the house pushing his will around, on top of my already stressful day.

I believe true love would take initiative, be right there with me through each day, My perfect boyfriend list to see me every chance he gets, and would conquer my fear or distaste of men. This guy doesn't none of that.

My perfect boyfriend list

Thank you for this article to keep me looking for something real. Kindness is not always appreciated. By the wrong person, it can be exploited or mocked. Or by someone who seemed right for awhile. But, if it is in your heart then share it. As difficult as that sometimes can be. I so hear you, Wayne. The inspiration for this post came from one of my male coaching clients who is such a kind man with so much to offer, yet he, too, was questioning whether "kind" was a negative, rather than a positive quality.

My perfect boyfriend list

How sad that this is how far we've gone in the opposite direction from our truest hearts and souls that know without a doubt that kindness is a positive quality to be loved, and valued, and appreciated, and sought out above all else! Don't let this experience change you, Wayne. It is only that she wasn't able to receive this, that she isn't able to embrace herself with her own kindheartedness that would have My perfect boyfriend list her value your kindness for its priceless value.

For someone who loves and values herself, your qualities will be more than appreciated; they will be sought after and valued beyond anything you've experienced before. Don't change this; embrace it and value it. And when you come across someone who values this in you, this is how you will know! Since ing the "Jane movement" I have completely changed my views, vision and list.

My perfect boyfriend list

Tall, dark and handsome are now at the bottom of that list. Once I realized what was really important to me and started focusing on that, there was a different kind of attraction to a different type of man. I am now dating again, all really good quality men with values that I find important, kind, loving, attentive, forgiving and positive. I'm having a wonderful time. Never dating more than 1 man at a time but I am certainly enjoying getting to know the kind of man that I "need" instead of "want".

Thank you thank you thank you for sharing your wisdom with My perfect boyfriend list.

My perfect boyfriend list

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